Parenting is probably one of the most difficult, most humbling job a person can ever have (and will ever have, I think). It doesn't matter the age of the child, with each new stage comes new challenges.... In the beginning, it is just learning to love a child who is completely dependent on you- loving and taking care of someone with NOTHING in return goes against our human needs. After that, when the babies start gaining personalities and routines (or lack there of, in our case), it is learning patience because though the baby gives recognition cues, baby can't speak or really control himself. After this, for about the next 18 years and in varying degrees, come the training up of the babies into respectable young men and women.. teaching right from wrong, good vs. bad, and love vs. hate. (I am pretty sure the younger years are the hardest in this stage, as we are in year four, and having the most difficult time yet, but I will let you know which stage is the most difficult in about 14 years :P)
Our daughter is a beautiful and talented little girl who shows love in such sweet ways to her brother, her cousins, her friends, and even to her daddy and I sometimes. She is thoughtful, curious, and super polite to her teachers and friends' parents. She is overall, a great kid. All of these traits, however do not excuse her from have human tendencies such as greed, pride, selfishness and other things that are not so desirable (okay, not at all desirable.) Maybe we should call it what it is -- sin. And we ALL do it! We are all selfish, and greedy, and prideful sometimes. Sin is something that is in us from the day we are born, but kids learn from what they OBSERVE as well. I know that some of the ways she acts is due to MY being impatient one too many times, or my short reactions when asking a question. But it is still so frustrating!
None of us are perfect people, let alone perfect parents. The difference (hopefully) between us and our children is that we have already learned the correct way to deal with our feelings -- we should know that it is not okay to hit and kick and scream when we don't get what we want. It is our job to teach our children how to deal with their feelings, and help them channel negative (and positive) energy into a healthy way to release it.
Okay, so all of this to say, that really, I feel frustrated. I feel frustrated that my four year old insists on screaming and hitting when I tell her she needs to sit in time out. I feel frustrated when I forget that she is in fact, only four years old, and is still learning how to deal with these feelings. I feel frustrated when I make a wrong choice and get short with her.
And sometimes, I feel hopeless. Is she ever going to learn right from wrong? Will she grow up and go down the wrong path because of my choices right now? Am I doing all that I can to help her grow into the beautiful person I know that she is? And most importantly, HOW DO I MAKE THE SCREAMING STOP!!!?!?!?
I don't have the guide to perfect parenting. I am just being real and letting you know that you are not alone in the frustrations. Let's keep trying, and lets not give up on our kids. Let's pray for them, and when we are frustrated, lets step away and pray before making any rash decisions. This, too, shall pass, and our children will grow, just like we will. And, even though it might seem like they hate you during the 4 minutes that they have to sit in time out, the kisses and hugs afterward are totally worth it.
Know that you are not alone. We all go through different struggles, and its okay. I will be praying for you today, because I know that not every day is perfect, like maybe our facebook pages show. We all have bad/hard times too. But YOU can get through this, we can get through this. Tomorrow is a new day, a fresh start :)
Stay encouraged!
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